Here, at Renewing Your Mind Life Coaching, the top priority is to help you think differently about what you think about.
Louise Hay said, "I do not fix problems. I fix my thinking. Then problems fix themselves".
In this post, we will address how to fix our thinking as it concerns the feeling of being taken for granted/unappreciated.
When we give of our time, our finances, our love, or of ourselves, we have placed a value on that which is given. Not only do we place a value of quantity but we also place a value of quality on which is given. We hope that the recipient will value the receipt of the gift as we valued giving the gift. It is when we determine, through our perception, that the value we have placed on the gift given has not been met with the enthusiasm and appreciation from the recipient as we have deemed appropriate, that feelings of being taken for granted or unappreciated often result.
What is necessary to consider in these situations is that value and appreciation are subjective. The value placed on something or someone is influenced by the individual(s) giving and the individual(s) receiving. Our values are shaped by our personal opinions, our personal tastes, and even on our emotions. Therefore, it stands to reason that what one person values highly, another may not attribute the same level of value to the object, act, individual, etc.
We have no control over the value attributed to what we give by others. We can only determine to give with the understanding that we have given something of value and hope that it is received in a manner that is conducive to what we perceive as appreciation. Yet. we do this with the understanding that what we value immensely may not be received in a manner that communicates that it is highly valued by those to whom we give.
Which brings me to another point, communicating appreciation. As we think differently about what we think about, we must understand that not all people show gratitude and appreciation the same. There are those who may dance a jig to show their appreciation and others who may simply say a quite 'thank you'. Realizing this, we must take into account that a person's demonstration of gratitude or appreciation may not fully articulate what is felt.
Just remember:
"Gratitude is one of the least articulate of the emotions, especially when it is deep." (Felix Frankfurter)
